I’m interested enough in this game to pick it up when it comes out, but I have to admit that I didn’t finish the first one. I liked it well enough, but my interest in it just petered out over time, and at some point, I just never came back to it. I hope that “i” will be a little more compelling. Either that, or I hope my attention span has increased over the last ten years!

Hold my 401k, I’m goin’ in!

“Replicator, give me a slice of mushroom pizza.”

“Hot or cold.”

“Hot.”

“Space-warping travel mushrooms or the ones that grow on old logs.”

“Uh, the log ones I guess.”

“Coward.”

“You want me to play a robot? But I want to show off my acting range!”

“Don’t worry, you’ll also get to play two other robots and a couple of old guys!”

“Aaass yoooou–” *squish*

*dabs corners of mouth with a cloth napkin*

*erupt like Vesuvius*

“You already reversed the polarity? All right, but did you really? Let’s do it one more time while we’re on the phone together… oh, it’s working now? Yeah, that is weird, goodbye.”

“What is… a ‘Puppy Bowl?’”

Is an ass-wagon something you’d use to haul ass?

“If you think that is bad, you should see what he did to my brothers. Why are you laughing, that was a genuine request.”

Months later…

Tuvok: “Captain, I must object…”

Janeway: “Ugh, I should have left you in Tuvix.”

Tuvok: “… I beg your pardon?”

Tuvix learned too late that giving speeches doesn’t solve anything (unless you’re a captain).

“Wait, he’s got the trombone out – BACK TO FIRING AT WILL!”

Gorn Captain wasn’t doing it for me, I have to admit.

Hope the lifestyle comes together!

“This… is a warrior’s bird.”

“Insert 400 tokens.”

ring

“Hi Jeff, this is Terry from Paramount, and–”

“Yes.”

Millions of miles of complex nanowire circuitry… not one single 30 amp fuse.