my main concern is it needs to be more capible than a nas /while being cheap af /with decent selfhosting options

I would recommend Mailcow. It’s docker based. Has an unificial way to instal portainer. And is docker based. And easy to update and there are decent setup tuts on YouTube. I’m using itt myself on my server. And it’s realy easy to install /keep up tot date. Using a shell script

Ive bin using oneprovider (Frans /Amsterdam) for a while now. They somtimes got some decent dedi server for like any where between 10/16 euros a month (1tb HD. 4gig ram is usely like 10to12 euro month . Kinda depends on what you want. But they are nice servers space wise.

My advice is. Try to keep wat you selfhost doable to run /set up. Selfhosting can be a rewarding hobby. But also a lot of work depending what you want to host. Just take your time. And plan things out.

Ive used both Portainer or yacht. Its a decent ways.to manage docker stacks/aps.it kinda depends on the wishes you have app wise. Im also trying out a project named cosmos.(simplyfied portainer like app but with a focus on ease of use) on afriend server

This looks like a great idea. It would inprove lemmmy instances. Especialy the one user instances