Now from Narj, Moops! All Terrors is a balanced part of any deathfast.

With a flavor factor of Warp 10, this cereal is engineered to taste like nothing you’ve ever experienced. Eating it might make you question the nature of the multiverse and whether the mirror universe is real or just, like, a reflection of the internal conflict within us. Far out dude.

This cereal is not intended for consumption by Klingons, Vulcans, or any known species with internal calcium deposits. Consumption by Ferengi is highly discouraged; they may attempt to profit from your cereal withour permission. Check with your ships medical officer before enjoying Moops! All Terrors. Side effects may include temporary loss of bones followed by accusations of being a changeling. The consumption of Moops! All Terrors! may result in unexpected time-travel experiences. We recommend keeping a tricorder handy to document your adventures and to make it easier for other Starfleet personnel to accurately determine your cause of death. The Federation does not endorse the consumption of Moops! All Terrors! Starfleet personnel should only consume on shore leave. The Prime Directive still applies in your cereal bowl.

Boldly taste what no one has tasted before!

Now back to your regularly scheduled program, Car Talk with Martok. That’s right, the Klingon with a penchant for horsepower is here to answer all your cosmic car conundrums. Ever wonder how to soup up a shuttlecraft or fine-tune a Ferengi freighter? Martok’s got you covered. So grab your tricorders and sonic wrenches, because it’s gonna be a warp-speed, wheel-spinning ride! Engage, and let’s cruise through the cosmos with Martok!

(Yes I am annoyingly proud of writing this, and yes I had a stupid amount of fun and yes I’m a mess)